If you’re anything like me you always want to be the one giving out the support, and likely prefer giving to receiving. That being said, you have that circle of people who support you and love you for a reason. The authentic beings in your life will be there for you, but it is up to you to be vulnerable and utilize them. It’s okay to not always have the answers. It’s okay to feel off. And it’s definitely okay to lean on the people who care for you most. Chances are you’ve given so much of your time, effort, love, and care to the people who mean the most to you. This natural instinct to be good does not take away from your need to seek good. Allow those around you to be there for you, like you are for them. Relying on those around you is not a weakness or a fallacy of your self-image, but rather demonstrates that you have the strength to seek out the support you are so deserving of.
Throughout these last few weeks I have endured more pain than ever, but the reason I am here, writing this, is because my support system got me here, helping me through my silent battle, every step of the way. As much as we wish it was the reverse, the toughest times in our lives reveal our biggest cheerleaders, for those who are by your side at your worst, will be there to celebrate you at your best. There is nothing wrong with wanting to feel like you again, unless you plan on getting there alone. There truly is strength in numbers, but quality over quantity still holds true; just having one person in your corner is more powerful than being in that corner by yourself. Everyone faces their fair share of adversity in this life, and if you disagree, you’re probably lying to yourself, avoiding the harsh truths of reality.
We are constantly surrounded by people who care, but why is it so hard for us to reach out to get the care we so desperately need? Hiding behind the shadows of your own self-doubt will only tarnish how we feel about ourselves. We need to break the barriers we create for ourselves and step outside the little box that we have curated for ourselves to open the door for our people to walk through. Our people are our people for a reason. Just because you prefer being the “strong” friend or daughter, or girlfriend, or sister does not mean that you can’t have moments of weakness. It is these moments that separate those who truly care from those who are just there. Our toughest battles reveal our team of soldiers, as those who are genuinely there for you will show up and make sure you know that their support is at your disposal anytime you need it.
The first step to clarity is realizing that God put us on this planet with billions of other people, not just for show, but for a purpose. Our people, our tribe, our circle is so sacred to us; if they needed you or needed anything, you would be there, you would show up for them. Take down the wall you’ve built yourself and let them do the same for you. Don’t resist the support just because you don’t want to address the problems you’re facing. The whole point here is that you don’t have to face anything alone, you have a crowd of supporters, and once you slowly but surely open your eyes to this, you will feel a weight lifted off of your shoulders, liberating you of some of the struggle. No one can solve your problems for you, but the right people can, and will, be beside you every step of the way. Don’t forget that.
As much as everyone needs you and your love, you need that same love back. Accept it. Pray to keep it. And reciprocate whenever you are healthy enough to do so. You can do this, but you do not have to do it alone. More than anything, please realize that you have a support system for a reason; to keep you going, to keep your spirits up, to remind you that things do get better. Whatever battle you’ve been facing or whatever battle is to come, just take this single piece of advice; lean on those who lean on you.
xx,
Kay
